So, the youngest among you probably haven't stopped to consider this yet but a fact of life for men above a certain age is Trimming Hair In Ridiculous Places.
In particular, a guy with long nose hairs just isn't the dashing man about town he imagines himself.
So I was trimming them today by a method made necessary by the recent death of my Nose Hair Trimming Device, after years of faithful service: I push the tip of my nose skyward and then, with a disposable razor, carefully scrape away the hairs most likely to stick out and mar my good looks.
And I managed to cut myself. I actually CUT MYSELF SHAVING THE INSIDE OF MY NOSE.
It's things like this that remind me that humility isn't just an attractive personality trait, it's also truth in advertising when one CONSTANTLY FUCKS UP IN RIDICULOUS AND ABSURD WAYS.